Parents & Family Resources
September 2005 Monthly Email
Happy September to all CSU parents & families!
It is only the beginning of the third week of school and yet, a lot is happening on campus! Attached to this email is an update of issues and helpful information tied to the month of September, as well as a variety of articles published recently regarding sending kids to college. Please take a moment to open and read the attachments, click on a few links and explore the opportunities available for students...when they take the initiative to sign up, show up, or reach out!
- October 7 – 9 is Family Weekend/Homecoming! Click on this link (www.familyweekend.colostate.edu) to view the entire schedule and register your family to participate. Please note that parents & families are welcome and invited to every event, especially the Campus Update with the Vice President for Student Affairs, Dr. Linda Kuk on Sunday, October 9 at 1:30 p.m. This program is sponsored by the Parent & Family Advisory Council.
- It has come to my attention that some families were confused by the $65 Ram Welcome charge that appeared on the August bills for first year students. This fee was approved by the Board of Governors a few years ago, however, because of the complexity of the tuition billing this year, it was inadvertently left off of the July bill. We caught this missing charge and inserted the yellow Ram Welcome flier and a special letter explaining that the fee would be placed on the August bill. We apologize for the confusion. To clarify, this charge covers the 4-day Ram Welcome events prior to the beginning of school as well as the extensive freshman transition services (mentoring and workshops) provided throughout the year.
- All first year students are encouraged to participate in Ram Connections Mentoring groups and can still register for a group by going to www.ramwelcome.colostate.edu and clicking on the Ram Connections Mentoring link in the grey box. There are groups based on the large, introductory freshmen classes, general groups, and affinity groups based on common interests or backgrounds. In addition to the mentoring program, numerous freshman transition “Strength Training Workshops” will begin on September 13. Topics identified for this fall include time management, study skills, using the library & internet research skills, financial management, preparing for spring registration, exploring study abroad options, healthy relationships and major/career exploration. Each workshop is offered at two different days and times for maximum attendance. Attached is a calendar of the workshops. All resident assistants have posted this calendar on the residence hall floors and posters are going up all over campus.
- Colorado State University has reached out to students & families affected by Hurricane Katrina. At this time, we anticipate enrolling approximately 15-20 transfer students from Louisiana and Mississippi. Most of these students are being housed in the residence halls or on-campus apartments. In addition, community response has been terrific, offering free and reduced housing for students’ families displaced by the Hurricane. Current student initiatives on campus are focused on the upcoming Blood Drive sponsored by the Premedica student organization on September 13-15, a Live Life Late benefit concert to be held on September 15, and an on-going cash donation drive sponsored by the ASCSU (our student government) on the Lory Student Center Plaza for the next two weeks. A local foundation has agreed to match all cash donations received by September 17.
- I have just been alerted that we had a major incident in several Greek houses toward the end of last week involving alcohol consumption in some of the properties. Investigations have been concluded. Prior to this incident we had 26 Greek chapters recognized at Colorado State University. The recognition of one fraternity has been revoked, one fraternity and two sororities have been suspended for the year and can apply for reinstatement in the spring of 2006, and three other chapters have been given a warning. If your son or daughter is a member of a Greek organization, talk with them about this situation. I will do my best to answer questions as I receive information.
- There have been several articles published recently concerning sending children to
college. Below are links to articles focused on helping students deal with roommate
conflicts, a relatively new phenomenon called “helicopter parents” at colleges and
universities, and an article focused on how families are dealing with “feelings of
empty nest.”
In closing, I asked a colleague to share her experiences sending her oldest daughter to college this fall. She has worked at Colorado State University within the Division of Student Affairs for a great number of years, and yet, acknowledges that all her years as an administrator are null & void when it comes to sending her own daughter to college.
A Mom’s Reflections
“...coming from a ‘university administrator perspective’ I completely agree that parents have become overly involved in virtually every aspect of their child's college experience, taking away the student's responsibility of owning the experience for him/herself. I have witnessed it quite often with issues especially in our office.
On the other side of the coin, I see how this can happen as the separation from the child is difficult. By getting overly involved, it can be a way of ‘dealing with the loss’ and trying to maintain the role of what we think a parent should be nowadays. ‘If I'm not overly involved, then I must not be a good parent!’
With my daughter, we as parents really have tried hard to let her have her own experience, from applying to colleges, looking for scholarships, and selecting her classes. Certainly we have disagreed with her, and there were conditions set as to how much we would/could support her financially thru the process. We want her to know money for college doesn't grow on trees for mom and dad! And, that college is a privilege that should be valued as such.
But do I want to know what she is doing every day now? Yes! Do I want/expect a call at least once a day to touch base? Yes! Do I have to fight not to lecture her on time management? Definitely! And do I struggle feeling like I have less of a role in her life right now and miss her terribly? Absolutely. But I keep remembering that the gift in all of this is that I get to see my daughter stand on her own two feet, and do so with amazing strength - strength that I don't believe I had to the same degree when I was her age. So, somewhere along the way, we must have done something right, huh?”
As I reach out to other staff members with first year students attending CSU as well as at institutions across the country, they echo her perspectives. One colleague emphasized that she knew “in her heart” when she left her daughter at her new campus that “this was the right place for her, which helps when the sadness hits.” Another staff member shared that he misses his son on a daily basis, the house just “doesn’t feel right” without his son, and agreed that he feels like “an arm is missing, without [his son]”. Another staff member said that her youngest child is celebrating all the attention focused on him as the last child still at home. Families experience transition on many different levels: individually, the family unit as a whole, and at the parental/marital/partner level. Being aware of, acknowledging and talking about family members’ transition experiences and emotions are helpful means of coping and getting through these challenging times. I am happy to visit with family members to listen, support, discuss options for resolving difficulties or to celebrate great accomplishments!
Best wishes for a terrific month of September and thank you for cheering for and supporting your students!
Sincerely,
Jody Donovan, Director
Student Transitions and Parent & Family Programs
Colorado State University
201 Administration Building
Fort Collins, CO 80526
(970) 491-5312